Close Encounters of the Third Grade Kind: Thoughts on Teacherhood

If you're looking for some light, but entertaining reading then you've come to the right place. Mr. Philip Done does an excellent job of describing the trials and titillations of educating third graders in the public forum.  Being a school teacher definitely is not for the faint of heart (or stomach!)

The author has done an excellent job of evoking word pictures to make you laugh and begin your memories of being a third grader again. I had forgotten about the "invisible" balls that we would toss back and forth at recess. And his vivid portrayal of a third grade boy stirs memories of why I despised them so much when I was in the third grade -- arm farts, bad, bad jokes about bodily functions and the need to stick things up their nose during lunchtime, just to name a few.  And to think we grow up to marry these "interesting" boys later on in life -- go figure!

One thing that I really enjoyed about the book is its layout. For example, the chapters are set up according to the school year which allows the reader to really get into the "school" frame of mind. I appreciated the behind the scene classroom preparation (See p. 36 paragraph 1) that Mr. Done describes -- it explains a lot about the way some of my teacher's rooms were decorated. And he gives practical and hilarious advice to people who are just entering "Teacherhood."

Each month has a theme and contains many stories of his adventures with his classes over the years.  And his stories aren't just about the children. He includes the whole cast of characters: principals, parents and the community that he lives and works in. Reading his book gives you a very well-rounded idea of what being a teacher is really like.  I mean, I never would have thought that being a teacher during the school shopping season could be so perilous, would you?

Mr. Done says something in his September chapter that I think all parents, especially homeschooling parents who are with their kids 24/7 need to keep in  mind. Mr. Done asks (and answers) the question:

"Would I trade this life of giggles and stories and songs and runny noses and glitter and chairs that are too small to sit in? Not in a million years. Life with kids is a rich one. And though there are days when I'd rather not deal with spilled paint and the missing books and sic Betta fish, I'm sure that someday when I'm retired I will look back on all of this and itch to clean out a backpack, pump up a ball, and hear a good knock-knock joke."

Our lives with our children is indeed a rich one. And one thing that Philip Done accomplishes masterfully in his book (and in his classroom) is to infuse his teaching with humor and joy. As educators of our own children we need to keep in mind that this time we have with our children is limited. We'll never be able to put them back into a bottle and have them be six or eight or twelve again.

So this homeschooling year I'm working really hard to make sure that I have realistic expectations. I don't expect my 6-year old to ever finish a story in under 20 minutes, so I'd better schedule art around the time her stories bubble forth. She can color and talk much better than doing math and talking. And my two, almost three year old needs to have some energetic workout time, so breaking up the day with my new FitFactor Kids video will give him a chance to jump around with his sisters.

I'm hoping that the repeated "gym times" throughout the day will limit his interruptions and help him be more patient while waiting for the girls to get finished with their work. And Jade needs to have a written schedule or else it's my fault that I have to endure cries of "That's not what you said this morning!" as I tell her what her next assignment is. Because life's too short to be all uptight. (Just don't tell them I said that!)

I really enjoyed this book. It evoked memories, made me laugh, cry and even taught me a couple of tricks to use on my sometimes unenthusiastic children to keep their interest peaked. I think it's excellent therapy for stressed out homeschoolers because it is great for gaining perspective. Especially after they've spilled the paint on the floor, used an entire roll of tape to hang up one small picture and think using glue for lip gloss is a great idea.  I mean, as Philip Done says, "What else can you expect from a third-grader?"

(I look forward to reading his previously released book 32 Third Graders and One Class Bunny: Life Lessons from Teaching. I wonder how much mayhem can be caused by a class of  third graders and one little fuzzy bunny -- the suspense is killing me ...)